Gold Star Mother’s Day

September 30, 2012 is Gold Star Mother’s Day. Please take a moment to remember the families of those who have made the ultimate sacrifice.

Gold Star Mother’s Day is observed in the United States on the last Sunday of September each year. It is a day for people to recognize and honor those who have lost a son or daughter while serving the United States Armed Forces.

I Should Have Known…

“What do you want to be when you grow up?”

That’s probably the question that is most asked to little kids. You hear answers like a doctor, a fireman, a teacher, and so on.

I never knew what I wanted to be when I grew up. I still don’t think I know…. Other than being a great parent to my kids and an awesome grandparent to my 4 grandkids. Those are the things that make my world complete.

When my daughter was little, she knew she wanted to be a pediatric nurse, even before she could say pediatrician.  I think she may have called it a baby doctor. Now, 20+ years later, what is she?? … A very skilled pediatric nurse. I am very proud of her. Not only for being a great RN but also for knowing at such a young age what she wanted and keeping that goal in sight until it was achieved.

When my son was little, he bounced from one title to another…  but they always involved dressing up in dad’s old work uniforms and playing some sort of military games. As he got a little older, paintball games came into the picture. As a young kid, he could tag out a team of grown-ups in no time. He always strived to be the best at whatever he was doing.  Other kids always seemed to look  up to him and he became the natural leader of the group.

Looking back at this now, I don’t know why it still shocked me when he said “I’m joining the Marine Corps.”      …    It’s VERY clear now… “I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN WE WERE RAISING A MARINE!”

 

Originally published on comfycouchcommnd.com

A Day to Remember ~ Homecoming from Marine Mom Perspective

YOU KNOW YOU’RE A MARINE MOM… when the final 2 weeks of your countdown seems to last FOREVER!!
  
Have you ever been involved in a military homecoming?? It is probably the MOST emotional thing I have ever experienced.
You start planning for it as soon as your loved one deploys. The months seem to drag by and the only thing that keeps you going is thinking about that homecoming day. Each day you mark off another square on the calendar… Finally it’s the half way point and you think surely it’ll speed up now… WRONG!
Keep marking off those squares… Now it’s down to 2 months left so it must speed up now… WRONG!
Why are the days going slower and slower!!?? Is there a physics equation that relates to time passing at SNAIL speed??
 
However, now that it’s down to 2 months, you want to start looking at plane tickets, hotels, rental cars, etc. so you’ll have all that lined up and ready to go. Well, let me give you some advice.. don’t get in too much of a hurry just yet. One thing you can rest assured of is that their arrival date will change 15 times before they make it back.
 
Finally, it’s two weeks away!! You are so excited that no one can stand to be around you. You can’t concentrate on work, or anything else for that matter! The feeling of anticipation is indescribable. You’re packing and going over the checklist of things… special homecoming t-shirts “CHECK”… welcome home sign ”CHECK”…  welcome home gift “CHECK”…  camera!! … CANNOT forget the camera. (I had nightmares about forgetting the camera!)
 
At last the day has arrived. Check the hotline every hour on the hour for updates. Arrive at the homecoming location. (Holy cow, there’s a million people here!) Stress levels are high and rising. Finally there is word received that they have landed… wheels are on the ground!! (I still get goosebumps just thinking about it) It’ll be another 2 hours before they arrive at the base… now time is REALLY going at snail speed!
After what seems like days, someone in the crowd yells “I hear motorcycles! They are coming!” The parade comes around the corner and the crowd erupts! The Patriot Rider motorcycles are in the lead, then a few military vehicles, and FINALLY those big white buses! The tears are rolling now!!
 
You’ve seen the tear jerking photos before… couples embracing, new parents holding their babies for the first time, and so on. Well let me tell you straight up… those pictures are very emotional but they are NOTHING in comparison to actually being there! But, that being said, I’ll cherish my photos forever.  (The one above is my son.)
 
If you have been involved in a homecoming before, I hope this article gave you a few goosebumps as you remembered your own. If you have one coming up, buckle up and enjoy the ride! … oh, and most importantly… don’t forget the camera!!  
 

A Marine Mom’s Cell Phone Obsession

You Know You’re A Marine Mom ….. When the phone rings and you don’t answer it unless the caller ID shows it is your Marine and then you run over husband, cats, dogs, small children and little old ladies to answer the phone, no matter what injuries any of them might sustain in the process.

 

It’s amazing how attached I’ve become to my cell phone while my son has been deployed. Maybe attached isn’t the right word… obsessed would be more accurate I think. It “must” be within 3 feet of me at all times. I do several pocket checks during the day to reassure me that it’s still there. Panic mode ensues if the phone happens to get out of sight or reach.

If you have received calls from a deployed loved one, you are familiar with how the numbers appear on the caller ID… just six digits. Each time you see those digits on the caller ID, it’s like the world stops for a split second. You stare at it for a moment as if you’ve forgotten how to hit the “answer” button. But you quickly come to your senses and scream to anyone in hearing range… “IT’S HIM!!!” After you answer the call, you are completely unaware of anything going on around you. Whether the call lasts 5 minutes or 45 minutes, the person on the other end of that call has your undivided attention the entire time.

I quickly realized that when these calls came in they were normally from the same number. So I decided I needed to give that number a “special” ringtone. Something that could be heard from about 2 miles away… something that would wake me from a dead sleep… something that would be unmistakable… I chose a ringtone that sounds like something you’d probably hear during a nuclear meltdown. When you hear “THE” ringtone it saves you a few seconds because you can skip the “staring at the phone” part and go straight to the “IT’S HIM!!!” part.

 

~This article was originally posted at comfy couch command~

To Mom with Love from the Combat Zone

I have a question for all the mothers out there.  What comes to mind when you are asked about your favorite Mother’s Day gift or tradition?  For most of us it is probably something very simple.  Mother’s Day is synonymous with breakfast in bed, hand picked flowers, finger paintings, and sloppy kisses.  Mother’s Day gifts are rarely store-bought because the best ones come straight from the heart.

In the early years, it’s usually up to dear old Dad to make sure we aren’t forgotten.  It doesn’t take much to make us feel loved.  Any day we can put up our feet and listen to thank you’s is special. The memories of hand-made cards and the burnt toast served by chubby little hands will always be etched in our memories.

As time passes and our children reach the teen years, we are touched to find out that the act of planting those early seeds has blossomed into our children coming up with their own ways to express their love to us on the annual holiday.  The coffee mugs made in pottery class, the marigold ready for planting in the backyard, and the homemade cookies baked just a pinch past perfection are proudly given, and we are touched that these hormonal teens have taken a break from their text messages and Facebook posts to sit down and spend a few minutes to say, “I love you, Mom.”

Through the years, I’ve always been pleasantly surprised by the creativity that has gone into the gifts bestowed upon me for Mother’s Day, but to be honest, I always knew those gifts were coming.  With the Hallmark commercials and the Mother’s Day specials advertised all over town, our children and our husbands would have to be living in a shoebox to miss the fact that Mother’s Day was coming.  I never knew for sure, but I always felt certain that I was going to, at the very least, receive a card or be taken out to lunch.

It goes without saying that my favorite Mother’s Day memory of all time was totally unexpected. It came all the way from the Middle East and it came two days early.  My son, who was deployed to Iraq for the second time, called me to tell me I needed to check my email.  I was fully expecting a wish list of items that he wanted me to send to him in his next care package, but much to my surprise, when I opened my email, I found the most amazing Mother’s Day gift ever!  The moment I saw the photo of my beautiful boy holding the cardboard sign wishing me  “Happy Mother’s Day,” I burst into tears.

There was nothing more beautiful in the entire world than to see that my boy, who was deployed to a war zone, had the forethought to figure out how to make me feel special for Mother’s Day.  I wouldn’t have even expected him to know it was Mother’s Day.  In fact, the year before, during his first deployment, he was outside the wire and had no idea Mother’s Day had come and gone.  I never told him he missed it because he had much more important things on his mind.

Maybe his platoon sergeant ordered him to remember Mother’s Day.  I didn’t know and I didn’t care!  What I did know was that my brave Marine was halfway across the globe and he still loved his mom!  My heart filled with Marine Mom pride and I showed that photo to everyone I knew

It’s been seven years since I received this gift but I guess I’m still able to find a way to show it off.  I think it’s worth sharing because it speaks for the many who are out on the front lines right now and simply not able to say “I love you” this year with a card or a phone call.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the military moms past and present.  You’ve raised children who stepped up to sacrifice and serve their nation so you must have done something right!

Originally published on comfycouchcommand.com.

Military Life – It’s a Family Thing

 

Military Life… It’s a Family Thing

If you are reading this and you have a family member in the military, then you know the above statement is true. It not only has an effect on their spouse and kids, but also their parents, siblings, grandparents… and other family and friends.

Now, I’m not saying this is a bad thing…  

For example, your family will develop a strong sense of American pride. I have to admit, pretty much everything in my house is red, white, and blue or flag motif. I was a proud American before but more so now.

Your family will also develop a new kind of respect for the troops that protect our country. They give up so much, go through so much, and put their life on the line for us… Let me say that again…     THEY PUT THEIR LIFE ON THE LINE FOR US.          They deserve our respect and our support. Even if we don’t always support the reason behind it, we need to support the people that are doing it.

So I guess what I’m basically saying is that once you have a loved one in the military, your life will forever be changed. Some changes will be good and some not so good, but hopefully the good will outweigh the bad in the end.

As you can see from the picture I used for this article, even the family pet wants to get involved. I found her trying to stow away in a care package. No one family member knows exactly how the other family members are affected… each person has their own way of coping (this blog article is one of mine) … and their own set of things they worry about…   

But I assure you “it’s a family thing”.

 

~This article was originally posted by author here~

OPERATION S.E.N.D. Care Package Assembly

Mark your calendars and join us as we assemble boxes for our upcoming care package mailing on Wednesday, June 20, 2012. We will be meeting from 6:00 pm to 7:30 pm at our office in Millpond Center, 3650 Boston Road, Suite 146, Lexington, KY 40514. If you plan to participate please send an email to Ginny at volunteer@military-missions.org  or call Barbara at 859-221-9477.

We have had an incredible increase in the number of care package requests. Our list of soldiers is growing every day. With the sluggish economy and high gas prices, we are in great need of donations to meet the need. We hope you will download a copy of our care package suggestion list and plan to donate some items to be included in our packages. We are also in need of monetary donations to cover the costs of shipping. You can donate directly from our website.

Even if you can’t participate in this event you can still support our troops by spreading the word and reposting this event on your Facebook page.

CLICK TO REGISTER

DONATION SUGGESTION LIST

CLICK HERE TO MAKE A TAX DEDUCTIBLE DONATION

Ask Dr Diaz about Secondary PTSD

Military Missions and Voice of Warriors join together each Tuesday night at 7:00 pm to bring you VOW Talk Radio.

When men and women return from combat, family members step up to care for them.  With ten years of war, thousands are returning home with Post Traumatic Stress.  When PTSD is brought into the home, the family is going to be directly affected.  Many family members find themselves experiencing their own symptoms of what is known as Secondary PTSD.

Dr. Rolando Diaz  joins VOW Talk Radio on Tuesday, April 10, at 7:00 pm (EDT) to answer your questions about Secondary PTSD.  Dr. Diaz, a Give an Hour provider, and clinical psychologist with an independent practice in Arlington, Virginia, joins our show on the second Tuesday of each month to answer your questions about surviving life after combat.

Dr. Diaz will be clarifying the distinction between true PTSD, secondary experiences that are tied to the trauma that the service member experienced (e.g., a wife having nightmares of her husband’s accident), and the experiences that result from living with someone with PTSD.  All of these get labeled the same way but represent very different circumstances and need different treatment approaches.

Listen live by clicking here or calling the show at 424-258-9240. Don’t forget to join our live chat during the show.

Signs and symptoms that may indicate Secondary PTSD

  • The survivor may lose interest in family or intimate activities and may become emotionally isolated or detached.  Family members may feel hurt, alienated, frustrated and discouraged.
  • The survivor may exhibit behaviors that indicate he is irritable, tense, anxious, worried, distractible, startled, enraged, controlling, overprotective, and demanding. Family members may feel like they live in a war zone, often reacting in anger, or purposely distancing themselves from the trauma survivor.
  • Even if the trauma occurred decades ago, the survivor may act feel as if the trauma is still happening.  Family members may also feel as if their secondary trauma is still happening.  As time passes, the family may begin to avoid activities with others, and become isolated from friends outside the family.  They may feel that no one outside the family could possibly understand their situation.
  • The trauma survivor often feels there is no future for which to look forward. Family members may find it very difficult to have a cooperative discussion with the survivor about important plans and decisions for the future.
  • The survivor may have difficulty listening and concentrating. He may become easily distracted, tense, or anxious. He may become hyper vigilant, displaying angry and overly suspicious behavior toward family members. The trauma survivor may become fearful about problems becoming terrible catastrophes. As well, the family may find it difficult to discuss personal or family problems because the survivor may become controlling, demanding, overprotective, and anxious.
  • Family members may become over involved with the lives of healthy family members due to need for positive emotional feedback, or they may ignore the healthy members of the family giving all of their attention to the trauma survivor.
  • Family members may find their sleep disrupted by the survivor’s sleep problems (reluctance to sleep at night, restlessness, severe nightmares or episodes of violent sleepwalking).  Family members also often find themselves having terrifying nightmares, leading to a fear of going to sleep, or difficulty getting a restful night’s sleep.
  • Ordinary activities, such as shopping, driving or attending a movie may trigger traumatic memories and flashbacks throwing one into “survival mode” suddenly and without explanation.  The survivor may shut down emotionally, or leave abruptly leaving family members feeling stranded, helpless, and worried.
  • Trauma survivors with PTSD often struggle with intense anger or rage and often have difficulty coping with the impulse to lash out verbally or physically. Family members can easily feel frightened and betrayed by the survivor, despite feeling love and concern for their loved one.
  • Family members are also frequently exposed to emotional, financial, and domestic problems. Survivors experiencing PTSD may seek relief and escape with alcohol or other drugs.  Addictive behaviors such as gambling and eating disorders are common.  Addictions offer false hope to the survivor by seeming to help for a short time.  Soon these addictions increase the fear, anxiety, tension, anger and emotional numbness which go hand in hand with PTSD.
  • When suicide is a danger, family members face the unavoidable strains of worry, guilt, grief, fear, and anger.

Military Families Serve Too!

Military families serve too! If you are in a military family this won’t be news to you, but if you are a civilian, I hope you will consider all those whom you may know who are serving right here on the homefront.  Each one deployed has family and friends supporting them, and believe me, it’s not easy living on this side of deployment.

Take a moment to think about life from the perspective of a small child who misses her mommy, or a middle school boy who really needs his dad. If you are a parent, try to picture the world with one of your children deployed to a war zone. It matters not that the child is an adult. He is still your child.  What is it like knowing your sibling is in harm’s way? How long is a year when you are the only parent in the home and you are living with the fear that your spouse might never return?

Everybody who has a relationship with someone serving in our nation’s military is making a sacrifice for me and for you.  You can serve by supporting the military families in your little corner of the world.  Find a local organization which supports our military families and get involved today.  If you are in the Central Kentucky area, you can get started today with us at Military Missions Inc.  We support and encourage our troops, our veterans, and their families 365 days a year.

                  

 

A Mother’s Letter of Thanks

We often get requests to send care packages out to our deployed troops. Many of our requests come from a spouse or a parent. Some requests come from friends and co-workers, and we often get requests right from our troops.  Many will find our website and submit the name of a friend in their unit who is not receiving any mail.

Requests are often accompanied with information about the soldier, and we have the privilege of knowing a little bit about the one who will receive our box.   We send boxes out on a year round basis, so for the year “our soldier” is deployed, we might send him or her several boxes.  Each time we write out the customs form, type up the label, email the family member who referred him to get updates on his status, take a look at his photo on our “Hero Wall”, and pray for his safety, we get more attached to him and his buddies who are fighting for our freedom.

We will never be the biggest nonprofit out there.  If we were, we wouldn’t be able to keep it personal.  We don’t just have a list of names that get slapped on the top of a box every month.  We have a commitment to take care of our soldiers who are deployed in harm’s way, and we have a commitment to support their families who anxiously wait on this side of deployment.  Receiving letters such as this one tell us we must be making a difference.

My son’s unit is doing very well in Afghanistan. He tells me they are all enjoying all the packages they have been getting.  I have been sending many items as well and have adopted a young lady in the group who has not gotten packages (they did not tell me until three weeks ago).

I did get a call a few weeks or so back asking me “Mom what have you done?”  They had gotten several packages and were covered in goodies. He tells me how much they just love the cards and letters. My son has been passing on items their unit does not need to the Chaplain to redistribute so absolutely nothing goes to waste. 

His deployment will end the first week in January, so I am hoping that they will have a supported holiday while they are away.  Due to the job for some reason they are not able to get photos out like many units can.  I don’t know if you are doing your heroes wall but if so I have attached one of his boot camp photos and the only photo to come out of the FOB for my sons field promotion. As a mom they all look so tired and mine looks so skinny!

Everything aside, I want  you to know that your help is so much appreciated and gave me such peace, as a mother. I am disabled and overall my son tends to be what I consider more helpful to me than I am to him. I worried so much that I would not be able to bear the financial strain of the shipments myself, as you well know it can be pricey. Knowing there are groups like yours to take him under your wing set my mind at ease during uncertainty. I knew thanks to your group my child,  my son, my Marine, My Hero would not go without during such a stressful time because of my limitations. I am finding that with his help I am able to keep this up and he has had me add his comrade.  My only concern as a mother of course is for morale during Christmas.

Once he is home I would like to pay back for another soldier to be able to have the benefit of your support, will you please tell me how I can do this? Thank you more than mortal words can say.

Proud Mother of CPL. B

Texas